Natalie Feng

We all secretly judge others through ancient instinct of sizing either allies or enemies. On the other hand, in most cases, we prefer receiving sizable appraisals in return. Here comes the tricky part: it is tempting to try too hard, and the result is always worse than the underdone.

Over advertising is the first telltale of a under sized reality in disguise, but why is it worse than a small size by itself? Because puffing up reveals a wish for things one does not already have, well, not only about social embarrassment, exposed desire shows ego, which is vulnerability.

Plenty of examples can be found in show business. Harry Potter series: I can’t help comparing those teenager’s acting skills with experienced adults in movies – they really are the top British cast aren’t they? Therefore big contrast. I feel the parts of Harry, Hermione and Ginny are somewhat awkward, especially when they acted along with those actors/actresses who portrayed Hogwarts teachers. I was wondering what makes an actor appear unnatural on screen? Clearly they made lots of effort, but their play looks mannered with excessive cadences in lines, fidgeting and stiffness in postures. When you watch those roles in movie, you see the actor’s identity looms up behind the role constantly – the actor’s eagerness to look natural is right on screen, rather than naturally merged into the role. Ironically the harder they tries, the more artificial they appears.

Another example is with the Anne Boleyn role, many talented and beautiful actresses have portrayed this coolly cynical and iconic queen in history. The classy and very expensive Anne by Bujold is unforgettable, I am also bowled over by Dormer’s Anne – witty, fashionable, relentless. Connell, not so much – her Anne looks too upset, Connell was trying to excite audience’s sympathy with Anne being betrayed, whereas excessive emotion from actress spoiled the charisma of Anne. On one hand, the world is quickly bored by the recital of misfortune, on the other hand, actors’ ego silently shouting behind the role: “look at me” is not attractive.

Coming to the point: The rule applies the same from acting to public speaking. In Cakes and Ale by Maugham, he described a skilled presenter as “he faced his audience seriously, frankly, but with an engaging diffidence you could not but realized that he was giving himself up to his task with complete earnestness. Though now and then he pretended to be at a loss for a word, it was only to make it more effective when he uttered it.” That’s how much deliberate in the sincerity, without overdone.

Revealing of anxious ego devalues our presentation. True confidence comes without dissembling, the satisfaction from possessing ample faculties is the most attractive feature.